The List

Yesterday The A-Z Files on the The Advertiser asked the question, "What are/were your relationship deal breakers?" This got me thinking about how my List has changed over the years.

Oh, c'mon . . . don't tell me you've never heard of the List before. Alright, for those of you in denial, it's THE list of things that your ideal mate would and/or would not possess if all was right in this world.

I remember precisely putting my mental list of traits onto paper and, in essence, birthing this subconscience check list of boyfriend dos and don'ts. Man, I wish I could find that list. I bet it'd be a total trip to see some of the stuff on there. I'll have to set aside some time this Memorial Day weekend to look for it.

Anyway, what I do remember is that this list compiled by my 16- or 17-year-old self was quite complex and lengthy. In my mind, I had down to a tee what my perfect man would be. I wouldn't doubt that there were more than 100 things on this list. This is how specific I had been about my dream guy. Sadly, over time, I've had to let go of some of these things and be more flexible about this whole dating game thing.

Do you think that there's a correlation between getting older and letting go of your dreams? Is it just becoming wiser or is it settling?

Granted some of the things on my list were probably obnoxiously naive and superficial (hairstyle, how he wore a baseball cap, what cologne he wore, etc.), but I'm sure there were some good things on there as well (sense of humor, loyalty, honesty, possess a job, etc.).

Is it too much to hold on to most of the list or at some point do you just say to hell with it and scrap the list altogether? I think you still need to have some sort of standard or else why not date every Tom, Dick or Keoni, right?